Forgetting Who I Am

I want to inspire people..

I have many desires.. i want to play baseball for  a living.. i want to get inducted to the hall of fame.. i want to become a good person.. i want to be a great dad.. a great husband.. i want to coach.. teach… and i want to write music… but.. one thing i desire RIGHT now.. is to inspire you.. i want my words to soak into your soul and i want you to get that tingly feeling when something really moves you.. i want you to have goosebumps because of my lines and i want you to WANT to pick up a pen and inspire others…

many lyrics have done this to me.. i love the feeling i get when i hear eminem, tupac, wallflowers, bob dylan, mobb deep, mos def, citizen cope, jack johnson, bob marley, rage against the machine and dispatch… these people know how to write what they feel.. i want that trait.. i want to write to move people.. i don’t want to just put words that rhyme on paper… i want to put down something sacred…

this is my desire…

You ever wanted to cry… but you can’t?

Have you ever wondered why that is? do you just have no tears left to cry? or do you feel more like me… that you’ve become numb to all feeling..
I remember being an emotional wreck as a kid.. not in a bad way… but in the fact that i couldn’t ever stop from crying.. i remember being 16 years old watching lion king with my neice trying to hide my face when scar kills Simba’s father…

Pathetic i know

But now i feel almost as if my bucket of tears has run dry… i guess when you know no joy… you know no sorrow… this even field of gray is killing me slowly and i’ve forgotton how to laugh… i’ve forgotton how to cry..

i’ve become what pink floyd describes as “comfortably numb”

hell… i’ve even forgotton how to write.. i’ll leave it in your hands… what do you think

Since it’s my call
I’ll rock these same cleats
These cleats have been tied tight
Strapped around my feet
These cleats stole bags
Ground balls they’ve beat
When I step on the mound
They rock hitters to sleep
Since it’s my call
I’ll rock these same cleats
For these cleats have been there
When times got too deep
When my glove would boot
Or my swing had a leak
These cleats stay strapped
To my unstumbling feet
Too many people
Forget about their cleats
The foundation of success
When the building begins to creek
The tradition of excellence
Which many begin to speak
The perect placement of stability
In an unperfect peak
So since it’s my call
I’ll rock these same cleats
As my spikes stay in touch
With my roots underneath
And as god will bless me
I’ll accomplish this feat
And you can believe that these feet
Will rock these same cleats